i will trust in You and not be shaken.

i've never seen anyone this sick. ever.

since st. patrick's day, our little alyse has been drastically sick. yes, drastically. it started out with a simple and yet very odd 99-100 temp fever and some coughing. she had had a cold earlier, so this just made it worse. the next day(friday) she had the same thing, and during the night she threw up and hit 103. yesterday morning and afternoon it hit 105.3, which as you can tell, yes, can cause really, REALLY bad things to happen. even i don't understand all that the urgent care place explained, so im telling you guys everything we know.

saturday afternoon it was just my mom, me, nathan and alyse(dad's at another conference in D.C), and mom had the woman's retreat at church to attend. she left alyse with nathan and i at home, and then i went to babysit for some kids down the street for a couple hours, thus leaving nathan and alyse. when mom came by to check on how we were all doing, alyse had hit 105, we all freaked, and mom took her to the walk-in urgent care in town. they tested her for strep, infections, pneumonia, you name it. everything came out clear, which made them even more confused on why everything was happening.

they said they probably thought it was a virus(as she was laying asleep on the examination table...yeah. that says plenty enough there, doctors)that would come on and off, as it has been for all this afternoon. her temp comes down(yay), and it goes right back up. along with her coughing so hard that any ibuprofen or food comes back up, she hasn't eaten since wednesday night's dinner. sure, she's nibbled at things and drank some, but yeah, it's definitely not good.

the people at urgent care said that if her fever went over 104 again, we had to take her to the ER(which unfortunately, i wouldn't be too surprised if it happened), and they would run some major tests on her. otherwise, we're just suppose to try to get her to eat and drink and stop coughing so hard so throws up. yeah. not pretty.
seriously, i've never seen anyone this sick. ever. and it's freaking us all out.
she's living on our couch, and as i write this mom is still worried about my dinner which i never had despite alyse in front of her...oh, goodness. my mom is amazing.

through everything that's going on, us not knowing what to expect, what to do, mom is chill about everything. sure, she's a bit worried, but she keeps it all in God's hands no matter what's going on- especially with her pride and joy, "little baby girl". earlier today mom said that alyse looked like an Elmer's glue bottle-since her face is as white as a ghost, fairly complimenting her red hair...yeah. that shed a little light on the situation.

through any situation...we're called to praise God. there's a reason for everything. there's a reason why we must be forced through our horrid graduation projects, why people all over the place are dying every day, why alyse is majorly ill on the couch in the other room.

there's a reason, and God knows it.
i praise and thank Him for that blessed assurance...
maybe if alyse wasn't sick she'd get hit by a bus on the way to school. or she'd flunk her oh-so-lovely math test she has this week. im not sure, and those things are quite drastic and depressing, but looking at it that way always seems to help me. along with looking at it, yes, from a different perspective...

praising God through everything can definitely be hard, especially when you have no idea why it's going on and what's going to come of it. in this case, we're not sure what's gonna happen with alyse. we're praying she'll be better by tomorrow or the next day, which Lord willing, she will be, but we never know. hence the difficulty we're feeling right now when we have more answers.

on top of some other situations im going through right now, mostly at school, it's hard to have yet another situation where i have not the slightest idea in my right mind what's going on and WHY it is(especially when it involves my own flesh and blood)no answers, no nothing. in case y'all haven't noticed, it's hard to go from that. to still praise and thank God for his awesomeness in this situation...even though the storms may rage around me.

tonight at evening service, with all this in mind, we sang this song...which in my head, my perspective, my book, whatever you want...was a message from God through a ray of light on the situations at stake.

still, my soul be still
and do not fear
though winds of change may rage tomorrow
God is at your side
no longer dread
the fires of unexpected sorrow

God, You are my God!
and i will trust in You and not be shaken
Lord of peace renew
a steadfast spirit within me
to rest in you alone

still, my soul be still
do not be moved
by lesser lights and fleeting shadows
hold onto His ways
with shield of faith
against temptations flaming arrows

still, my soul be still
do not forsake
the Truth you learned in the beginning
wait upon the Lord
and hope will rise
as stars appear when day is dimming

God, you are are MY God!
and i will trust in you and not be shaken
Lord of peace renew
a steadfast spirit within me
to rest in You alone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YsXMiysZfNQ
this gives me goosebumps. every. time.

that has to be my favorite verse(3). because...yeah. ill be honest here. when things start going all chaotic around me, i don't get what's going on, i don't any answers, i start to freak. i started getting "Moved by lesser lights and fleeting shadows," and it's terrible!

here, God is trying to get my attention all weekend to trust him, and instead, i go off and do what i want. ignore His words, His screaming, "Lauren, I'm here...." and instead, it takes my sister getting plagued with a 105.3 temp, several instances last night that i won't explain, and THIS tonight.
all that to move me. some of you may think it took just this to move me. no...it took THAT to move me. that much. wow.

God, you are my God. And I will trust in You with this thing, and not be shaken by lesser lights...

Loves!
Remey.